Random Restless

10/3/08

Welcome to My Neighborhood

If you love your neighborhood, the worst thing you can do is advertise it, because popularity will steamroll its quirks into the ground.  Unless you advertise it like this...

(Photo: Bernd & Hilla Becher)

Welcome to My Neighborhood!

It's got a lot of history.  In the archival photo above -- displayed in the neighborhood museum behind the counter at Cheesy's Cellphone Shoppe -- you can see its genesis as a planned, utopian community, zoned (back-to-front) for work, home and recreation.


One of the first things you'll notice when you arrive is the bird life, especially in the nature sanctuary / landfill just above Main Street.  Not only does the neighborhood support so many pigeons (above left) that guano collection has become a major industry, but the buzzards in the dead trees above the landfill have become a tourist attraction, and Main Street butchers offer scraps, above right, to appease the majestic birds.


My neighborhood takes tourism seriously.  Attractions include the Kids' Wastewater Plant Fun House pictured above left, the Kids' Trapeze Experience above right, and guided tours of local industry such as the Second Life Sorting Facility, below left, and the Gold Country Guano Collection Facility below right -- both free (so long as you pitch in and help out; face masks are provided for the whole family)!



If you feel like shopping, above left, or like taking in some of the public art installed by our vibrant creative community, above right, just leave the kids under the watchful eye of the Scarecrow Tree, below left, which local parents use to keep their kids in line:

"OK, do whatever you want.  Just don't come crying to me when the Scarecrow Tree breaks into your room tonight!"

Or let them play in front of the Fun Spewer, below right.  The fun part is, you never know when it's going to go off!


And after a full day of exciting activities like that, you're going to want fine dining and accommodations.  My neighborhood can deliver on that count too, as you can see below!  (Just don't expect a delivery after dark.)